Chaste or being chased?

This weekend (and this may surprise some of the people who read this foul mouthed tirade of a blog) I attended a christian festival for young people.

It’s something I do now and again with a group of very particular friends. I don’t preach and I am not trying to make out I am a holier than thou Christian. The man upstairs would read this little lot and throw me out for sure!  

I lead a modern life, I’m not a virgin, the jig is up as they say but I do enjoy exploring faith.

However whilst I was there I did ponder on the issue of religion and questioned how important to me it is. Ideally I would prefer, when I do meet someone to settle down and have the kids with that he be Christian so that my children would be raised in a Christian setting, schools etc.

However when dating I’m not sure this matters, I don’t think I could date someone of any religion (different to my own or catholic like myself) who was at the extreme end of faith. I would say my thinking is progressive and modern and if someone feels so strongly about it I personally think they would be more fulfilled in a relationship with someone like minded.

Whilst I was on the weekend I met a girl who creepily has the same name and is the same age as myself. She has recently “returned” to the church after some time away (I’m still making my way back but the sat nav’s broken)

Now this young lady is not a virgin, has had relationships before, but she met a man at another christian event and they have started dating and have been dating a while.

They do not have sex, at all.

That needed its own paragraph. Now don’t get me wrong, good for the couple who have a made a moral decision for themselves. This girl wasn’t judging those who don’t abstain so it was fine.

But what an interesting conversation we had, about how sex can cloud how you feel about each other, it can create the illusion of a connection between two people and how a physical connection when rushed into can be mistook for how you actually feel about each other.

I have to say I am inclined to agree with this girl. Why rush into sex if the guy is genuine shouldn’t he understand that building a connection prior to the non maritals (oh come on I am not a nun!) is very important.

After all I don’t want to invest time in someone who I could have picked up in a nightclub and taken home because that’s how much it means to them.

So this lead me to question whether or not sex should be the last thing on my mind. Well thanks to whoever wrote the Christian Grey series which I am currently reading it’s not.  I should point out I didn’t take the grey books on my Christian weekend!

Whilst it would be nice to meet someone decent for a date (and I have a potential two this weekend so Sundays blog may be quiet long!) I can’t say I will be rushing things in the bedroom department, slowly slowly catchy nice boyfriendy.

At the end of the weekend she asked me if I can met anyone nice there and I replied no, because I had to be honest with this girl, whilst she had chosen to wait for the ring on her finger, its not for me, but then again that doesn’t mean I’ll be throwing my special treasure at the first guy I see.

So whilst I will be having dates this weekend I will be remembering that just because someone buys you a drink, doesn’t mean you have to open the brewery.